Today I was reading news articles on my iPad. I noticed that over the past week, every now and then there’s an article where the author appears to be paid by the word, based on the totally superfluous garbage used to set the scene, as if they were writing a play.

Here’s what I am talking about:

We sat together in a charming window booth looking out over the mighty moving mass of people on Tin Pan Alley rushing to and from important meetings, iPhones glued to their ears as if closing their latest big deals. The chintz curtains were a light green, which contrasted swimmingly with the red checkered gingham tablecloth in this tony Italian-Chinese fusion brew pub. Today I am interviewing Chester the Molester, the social media guru and Instagram Influencer over at Jydsk Danish Securities. Chet was wearing a natty five-piece outfit that was a mashup of traditional conservative Wall Street business attire from Hart, Schaffner & Marx, and punk lederhosen from Hannover, Germany, with a brightly-colored Arctic headgear with sealskin earflaps from northern Finland’s Sami people. I would go on and describe his footwear but in the interests of pubic decency, I will refrain. However, I was further struck by the well-trimmed and waxed beard and moustache Chet had affected this mild and windy sunny day…

And on and on…☕️